hujan; bila aku sudah tiada.

bila aku sudah tiada
simpan semua lagu ku
jangan di tangis selalu

mungkin itu sementara
bila jumpa pengganti ku
jangan di lupakan aku

pagi itu indah seperti biasa
tidur yang lena terhenti di sana
layap kuyu masih tak terdaya
bukalah tingkap mu
curahkan cahaya…

siapa yang sangka
bila tiba masa kita
untuk pergi selamanya

takkan terduga
jika saat ni
tuhan tentukan
aku lah orangnya

gelak tawa tangisan yang hiba
kenangan kita masa di dunia
alangkah indahnya jika
kita mampu hidup selamanya…




//
*sigh*

Rock on!! \m/

Smalam tadek training, ujan lebat. Lepak kat LG2 layan karaoke.. pastu bebudak tuh ada jamming kt blakang.. Join layan aa.. dorang main byk gak lagu.. creed.. chop suey.. incubus' drive..etc. Skali tuh main lagu Bring Me to Life.. tadek org nk nyanyi.. so pon aku blasah aaa.. fuhh layan siot.. cam amy lee plak rase ehehehehh.
Dasat2.. pasnih leh layan jamming lagik.. nak try nyanyi Umbrella acoustic version plak.. huakakakaka.

u guys rock my sox ah.
----------------------------------------------
edited : tepek gamba utk ann.

drummer : abg asri. bass guitar : abg malik. kibod : abg sham.


mamat yg kat kibod tuh namenye Adly. dia la yg maen drum masa tgh jamming taim aku nyanyi tuh. yg abg gitar sblah ni namenye abg Izam.


MIDA band.    

note : yg main lagu2 creed, evanescence n yg sewaktu dgnnye tuh bkan abg2 kt atas ni main.. mamat Adly n few mamat laen yg jamming. taim tuh aku tak sempat nk snap gamba. pics atas nih dorang tgh rehearsal utk MITI nye program ape ntah.

what hurts the most

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do

tears in heaven...

lastnite, i was dreamin abt my late parents..1st part was like abah n mak were here at home. They looked healthy as if theyre not sick. They're doing their usual chores..abah as usual, he loves gardening..mak, in d kitchen, cooking. then the 2nd part was it looks like we're in a journey to sumwhere i didnt know..abah was driving n mak sitting rite by him..n me sitting at the back..we were so happy like we're goin 2 a picnic or something like tht..then when i asked sumthing to abah (till now i dun rem wat i asked) n when he tried to ans, he hesitated, while mum juz looked at me..then it was happend like, i juz realised tht theyre dead. I was like, "Ya Allah, mak..abah?" after tht, the vision of them was vanished n i woke up. I realised tht my face was soaked wit tears. I then realised it was juz a dream... *sigh* it looked so real..even its like when i juz realised theyre dead, i stil cant believe tht theyre gone. Hmmm..mak, abah..hope both of u were doing well up there......

funny. serious funny. n i likeee it! hhaha. :D

this morning, my office mate, Edot told me tht she had this funny dream last nite. It's abt us n other officemate went to ISS (International Space Station) with Dr. Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor. (pictures)
wowww.. how i wishhhhhhh it was real. heeehehehe.

And, 1st part of her dream is, oh, this is the sweeeeetest part!! *drooling* hahahah.
It was abt me (read:  ME!! hehe) n Dr SMS were travelling alone (read: ALONE ;)) to ISS. Just the TWO of us. Walauweeyy.. hahaha i really wished it was real. I dun care. Even tho its juz in her dream.
(damn. wonder why i dun have this dream myself haha ;P)

*smilingggggggggggggg* heehehe.

opsss here's the 2nd part. forgot oready :P
ok this is the funniest part. after both of us came back to earth, i invited my 2 officemates including this Edot to ISS together again. N this time Dr.  SMS had to be left out bcoz tht spaceship can onli carry 3 ppl aite? *bloody spaceship* lol. So this is the moment where he got mad. haha funny eh? the reason why he got mad is bcoz he's the leader n why must he'd to be left out? hehehehe.

but the sadly part is she doesnt finish the dream!! warghhhhhhhhhh.
she woke up then n realized it was juz a dream. lolll. then all of us were laughing like mad.
but i like itttt so muchh hihihihihi.

*continues smiling n drooling* :P

                              Dr. SMS (left) n his siblings. 

if.

If you ever want something badly, let it go. If it comes back to you, then it's yours forever. If it doesn't then it was never yours to begin with. :)

last kiss

Oh where oh where can my baby be?
The Lord took her away frm me..
She's gone to heaven, so i got to be good..
So i can see my baby when i leave this world.......

(Hang in there mama, i'll get to "see" ya "anytime"..insyaAllah. Miss ya so much mom. You're my everything, da best thing dat ever happened to me. Al-Fatihah......)

am over it....

I'm over your lies
and I'm over your games
I'm over you asking me
when you know I'm not okay
You call me at night
and I pick up the phone
And though you've been telling me
I know you're not alone
oh..

That's why
(your eyes)
I'm over it
(your smile)
I'm over it
(realize)
I'm over it
I'm over it
I'm over..

Wanting you
to be wanting me
No that ain't no way to be
How I feel, read my lips
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time
you never were a friend of mine
Hurt at first, a little bit
but now I'm so over
I'm so over it..

I'm over your hands
and I'm over your mouth
Trying to drag me down
and fill me with self-doubt
oh..

That's why
(your words)
I'm over it
(so sure)
I'm over it
(I'm not your girl)
I'm over it

I'm over it
I'm over...

Wanting you
to be wanting me
No that ain't no way to be
How I feel, read my lips
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time
you never were a friend of mine
Hurt at first, a little bit
but now I'm so over
I'm so over it..

Don't call
don't come by
ain't no use
don't ask me why
you'll never change
there'll be no more crying in the rain

Wanting you
to be wanting me
No that ain't no way to be
How I feel, read my lips
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time
you never were a friend of mine
Hurt at first, a little bit
but now I'm so over
I'm so over it..

I'm so over it....
I'm over it....

Wanting you
to be wanting me
No that ain't no way to be
How I feel, read my lips
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time
you never were a friend of mine
Hurt at first, a little bit
but now I'm so over
I'm so over it...

tinggalkan aku.

Kata mu cinta telah tiada
Sendiri aku menahan pedih ini
Hilang semua rasa
Habis begitu saja
Untuk bersama buat selamanya

Kata mu dia yg lebih sempurna
Dia lagi jiwa
Dia nafas asmara

Bisikan kata-kata akhirmu itu
Menusuk jiwaku
Kini kau dtg utk kembali pada ku lagi

Pergi sudah tinggalkan aku
Ku tak ingin engkau ada
Kembali lagi ke dlm cerita hidupku ini
Ku bahagia tanpa dirimu
Biar begini adanya aku
Tanpamu ku temukan sinarnya

Usah lg kau guris hatiku
Ku tak mahu lg merasakan
Hadirmu dlm duniaku
Pergilah.. Dari hidupku

Tak ingin kau ada

Pergi sudah tinggalkan aku
Ku tak ingin engkau ada
Kembali lagi ke dlm cerita hidupku ini
Ku bahagia tanpa dirimu
Biar begini adanya aku
Tanpamu ku temukan sinarnya

Tanpamu.. Ku temukan.. Sinarnya.....

(a song by Anuar Zain)

Really?

Love needs sacrifice.
Maybe this is my sacrifice for him.

finally

"That day masa raya, pakcik dia tegur kitorg n suruh kitorg baik balik....so kitorg pun smbung blik....n so far everything went fine.....sy x smpi hati nk bgtau awk...coz sy xnk kehilangan awk n buat awk sedih..........sorry.....:("

Oh really? Good 4 u.




Bullshit.









Yes... I was crying like hell.

haizz

"Encik ah..tanya sikit ah..itu Chimpeng mana ah..?"

"Apa?"

"Chimpeng, Chimpeng...saya sudah tanya itu guard ah.. dia cakap sini ada satu Chimpeng...."

"Sorrylah Apek. Saya tak tau woh...Apa tempat itu Chimpeng?"

"Aiyah...itu Chimpeng balu punya..Saya mau pigi angkat wang la..."

"Tarak tau la boss. Itu kedai ka apa? Along ka?"

"Chimpeng bukan kedai ma..lu itu pun tak tau ah..? itu Chimpeng macam itu Maypeng, Public Peng, RHetB Peng...itu balu punya Peng.."

Adoi...bengap punya apek..buat pening je..cakap lah CIMB Bank .. =))


uhuhh..secara tak langsung ter-rilis kejap tensen aku.

tapi bukan aku

Jangan lagi kau sesali keputusanku
Ku tak ingin kau semakin kan terluka
Tak ingin ku paksakan cinta ini
Meski tiada sanggup untuk kau terima
Aku memang manusia paling berdosa
Khianati rasa demi keinginan semu
Lebih baik jangan mencintaiku aku dan semua hatiku
Karena takkan pernah kau temui, cinta sejati

Berakhirlah sudah semua kisah ini
Dan jangan kau tangisi lagi
Sekalipun aku takkan pernah mencoba kembali padamu
Sejuta kata maaf terasa kan percuma
Sebab rasa ku tlah mati untuk menyadarinya
Semoga saja kan kau dapati
Hati yg tulus mencintaimu
Tapi bukan aku

none

u expect me to understand, n yet u dont understand me?

stop calling me pls.

Gantung?

Ku harus menemui cintaku
Mencari tahu hubungan kita
Apa masih atau tlah berakhir

Kau menggantungkan hubungan ini
Kau diamkan aku tanpa sebab
Maunya apa ku harus bagaimana
Kasih…
Sampai kapan kau gantung
Cerita cintaku memberi harapan
Hingga mungkin ku tak sanggup lagi
Dan meninggalkan dirimu

Detik-detik waktu pun terbuang
Teganya kau menggantung cintaku
Bicaralah biar semua pasti

Tentunya hubungan cinta denganmu
Membuat ku sakit
Hingga mungkin ku tak sanggup lagi
Dan meninggalkan dirimu

??

A garbage is meant to be thrown away, so why pick it back up?

Current plays..

I made this music playlist at MyFlashFetish.com.


Numata - Curhat

Kasih dengar ceritaku
Tentang kegalauan hati yang meraja
Mengisi relung hati yang hampa
Pada diriku…

*
Kasih lihat diriku
Menatap sendu sedih air matamu
Kau berharap mengakhiri semua
Aku tak mau…

Tak ada seorang pun yang tahu
Betapa besar rasa cintaku
Lihat kesungguhan diriku
Tapi kau takkan mengerti

Tulusnya cintaku
Tak pernah terbalas olehmu
Kau biarkan hati ini membeku
Kandas cintaku…

Kembali ke *

Tulusnya cintaku
Tak pernah tersadar olehmu
Kau biarkan kisah kita berlalu
Kandas cintaku…

Tak ada seorang pun yang tahu
Tapi kau takkan mengerti…
Tulusnya cintaku
Tak pernah terbalas olehmu
Kau biarkan hati ini membeku

Oh kasihku…
Tulusnya cintaku
Tak pernah tersadar olehmu
Kau biarkan kisah kita berlalu
Kandas cintaku…

Vince/V.E - Andai Ia Tahu

Andai Kau Tahu Sengasaranya Aku
Berlagu Sedih Menanti cintaku

Andai Ia Tahu Betapanya Aku
Menunggu Mati Hadirlah Kasiku

Kerna Dia
Cinta Dia
Sungguh Aku Juga Cintai Dia
Namun Tak Terbalas Kasihku

Patah Seribu Hatiku
Tuhan Genggamlah Jiwaku
Tiada Dayaku Menahan Sebak Menusuk Kalbu
Andai Ia Tahu Laraku

Merintih Benakku
Menangisku
Tak Terpejam Mata Di Dalam Lenaku

Ingin Ku Meraja Mimpi Mimpinya
Jiwamu Hatimu Tiada Diriku

Kerna Dia
Cinta Dia
Sungguh Aku Juga Cintai Dia
Namun Tak Terbalas Kasihku

Kerna Dia
Cinta Dia Sungguhku juga Cinta Dia
Namun Tak Terbalas Kasihku Hanya Untukmu

that's it

Sorry. No more side work. Enuff already. I've done everything yet I cant get what I want, and no one ever noticed. That's it. I decided to quit. Period.






















This emo-entry is just related to my work..not this site.hehehe.pls dun misunderstood okeh.m not goin to quit multiply, 'I'll be here, as long as i can. dun worry :P

Raya...

The last photo taken as a whole family.. Raya 2005

Terus terang aku ckp, raya ni tak bawak apa2 makna kt aku..aku x rasa mcm nk raya pun..tp persiapan tu ada gak laa..utk org yg dtg nnt kan. beli je ala kadar. hati aku masih merindui.... masih terbayang2 lagi dlm ingatan saat aku menjaga arwah mak kt spital..kebetulan lak raya jatuh hari Sabtu..selalunya ari Sabtu ni arwah ada dialisis kt hospital..kalau raya jatuh hari yg dia kene cuci darah..kitorang akan tunggu dia balik..then baru salam2 n mintak maaf..

ni masa dia tgh koma selama 3 hari..

aku pegang tgn dia..semacam ada tindakbalas..mcm dia menggenggam balik tgn aku..tp dia mmg tak sedar..

itu la tinggal kenangan yg terakhir aku ngan dia..seminggu puasa..dah tempah kt org buat kepuk kubur dia..dlm 1000 lebih..dah siap dah pasang..

batu terrazo..

ni sambil taip ni aku dgr lagu Aris Ariwatan - 1 2 3 4.. saja layan syahdu sensorang kt opis nih..sume dah balik kg..aku je mls nk cuti..bkan nak buat ape sgt pun..dpt half day..jap lagi kul 12..balik le aku..ni pun bosan gile sbb malas nk buat keje dah..dtg lepak je..layan MP la pe lagik kan. Aritu masa aku beli baju (selai je pun..skadar syarat) mcm malas je nk pilih..selalu arwah yg suka pilih baju utk aku..bab2 baju mmg dia suka sgt belikan even aku dah keje ni..dia mmg camtu..suka beli utk anak2 kan..padahal bleh je nk beli sndri. Apepun..thn ni..tak dpt nak salam, cium tgn, mintak ampun..tp mmg aku teringat..masa last year raya..masa nak mintak ampun..aku sedih sgt2..tak tau kenapa..mungkin aku terasa saat tu mmg kali terakhir aku dpt minta ampun kt dia..dia pun x byk ckp..senyap jer..hmm..sedih mcmana pun. life has to go on. bila pikir2 balik..seteruk mana nasib kita..teruk lagi nasib org lain..mana yg tak penah merasa kasih syg mak ayah tu..anak2 yatim..lagi sedeh kan..kira aku ni..sempat merasa..sempat menjaga dia sakit..walaupun tak puas..tp ada gak bakti yg aku sempat bagi..aku harap apa yg kitorang buat utk dia..cukup utk dia..walaupun kalau nak kira mmg tak puas nak jaga dia lg...

Anyway, aku nk amik kesempatan ni nak wish korang.. Salam Aidilfitri utk kwn2 tersyg..warga Multiply...kalau ada tersalah kata, salah taip, tersalah download, upload, (hehe) harap dimaafkan..terima kasih byk2 di atas ucapan yg diterima..semoga satu hari nanti kita bisa bertemu di ruang realiti....

Curhat ku; (curahan hati)
Ieja...

;))

ihiks.. smalam dia datang umah amik hp yg aku tlg belikan. n secara rasminye kami berdua pakai hp yg sama.. yehaaaaa.. tp jeles gak sbb color dia lagik lawa dr aku punye. dia nye color plum. aku nye gold sand. tp tak kesah ahh.. janji hp same. muehehehehe.. *wink3* tp cam rugi plak sbb dedua pakai digi, takde 3G. takbleh video call..iskk.kena tukau telco lain la gamaknye kalo nak fully use the functions.huhuhu.